Birthday Thanksgiving

This entry is specially dedicated to my CG and friends who have made this birthday such a special one for me.

I want to thank June and Tracy for the surprises since this morning. U gals are so creative..yup, it was indeed an 'unknown journey' and I was glad u two were with me all the way...

Life is a road
And I want to keep going
Love is a river
I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road
Now and forever
Wonderful journey

I want to thank my CG: Tracy, Jason, Rachel, Shuling, Jeanette, Jonathan & Clarence for putting together the wonderful video- Transformation. I felt so overwhelmed that tears kept flowing. Thanks for being there with me and all ur affirmations and heartfelt wrds, I will keep it all in my mind and heart.

I also want to thank friends who have known me for years, my ex-shepherds, shepherd, Ex-sheeps, sheeps, ex- CG members, JC fren ( Masyita, Junting, Meiyan, Meiling, Kim Chun, Weizhu, Huichun, Winnie, Claire, Weiwei, Jinghe, Lean Choo, Robert & Christine) who contributed to the video with ur sharings of me - past and future. Thks for being part of my life.

I want to thank all who have given me their birthday wishes. Each msg is a blessing to me.

Lastly, I want to thank my almighty God who has changed me much, from who I was into who I am today, Though still in the process of being moulded, I believe He will continue to prune me. Dear God, I thank u for giving me a purpose to live for, confidence that comes from u and people around me who love me for who I am. You are indeed sovereign!

Happy Birthday to Me!

Happpy Birthday to me! 25 years old already.

Today you are one year older
Today you are one year wiser
Today you are one year stronger in your walk with the Lord
Happy birthday to you my sister, happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you my sister, we wanna wish u, we wanna wish u a happy birthday!

Thanks my Cinderellas! :)

A Night To Remember

Here's a snapshot of my birthday celebration with SHULING...

520pm: Tired and drained after the retreat from 8-5 at work, totally feeling like going back to slump right onto my bed.

530pm: Shuling is here! Cheery smile, lotsa energy and with excitement. She ask if I wanna take the bus or train to Vivocity. Me anything and we took the bus.
Bus Ride: A really long journey but the conversation was great. We shared our bucket list (new year resolutions) cos she has just watched the show earlier on. Talk about growing up and the friendships we have and had. I really see my younger self in her, the carefree spirit and teachability to learn.

630pm: Reached Vivocity. We saw a shop that has Tracy's name on it. In the spur of the moment, we took a picture with it and printed the picture. Indeed, capturing a moment in time.

740pm: Bought tickets to movie

815pm: We went to buy dinner but was distracted by the beautiful Xmas tree. Just have to take some shots of it. Our camera phones does no justice to the picture taken but nevertheless, the picture in the mind remains. It was gorgeous!


830pm: Reached Beach Station, all set to watch Songs of the Sea. My first time...there were so many pple but thk God we managed to get the seats in front, thks to SL's friend. I absolutely loved the show, especially the laser performance and the fireworks at the end of it. Amazing!

955pm: Watched the show, Bedtime stories. It is a heartwarming show and starred one of my favourite actors, Adam Saddler. The puppy eyes just melts ur heart :) A fantasy world brought into the real world, tht's how I will sum up the show. Which kind of sums up the night as well.

1130pm: The last surprise. I was told to close my eyes and reach out for something. Shuling say it's a hamster, I almost freaked out! Ha, thkfully its not but a nice, bright flower.

What a night to remember. Thanks, my dear SHU for everything. You are very special to me :)

How Did You Spend Your Christmas?

This morning I smsed 3 friends to ask them, "How was your Christmas spent?"

Person 1: Great! Was fun how bout u?
Me: Ha ok :) Had a good rest in the day and went for dinner at helipad for a drink with some friends for a catch up. What did you do?
Person 1: Went for a party n service before that. Then stay over at my friend's place hee catching up.
Person 2: Went out with my parents...
Person 3 (no response)

This year is a quiet Christmas for me, unlike past years when we had parties and movies etc on Christmas Eve. I had a good meet-up in the morning followed by a catch-up with 3 good friends in the night. Went for dim sum at Geylang with Jason before he went for his personal retreat to Bintan. It was good to be able to talk in a setting apart from ministry matters (though can't help mentioning it). It was a time of openess. I also received a phonecall from DAISY, all the way from US. Really brighten up my day :)

At night, went with Meiling, Meiyan and June for dinner and a drink at Helipad. It is a nice bar at the rooftop which overlooks the clarke quay area. The view was beautiful. I am glad to be able to spend time with these sisters who have seen me grow up from my university days as a christian. Both(ML and MY) are my ex-shepherds and in my opinion, people with gentle and sweet spirit. I really thank God for their guidance and how they helped me learn to be objective and grow from my wilfulness and stubborness. They have loved me with their hearts and now as I see them getting into a relationship with their other half, I see them exemplifying the same love. As I hear them share their experiences, I learn much and more to learn.

The basin at the helipad. It's is very interesting. You have to step on the button (hand pointing to it in the picture) in order for the water to flow from the tap :)

Year End Syndrome

(View from starbucks where we were sitting)

Had a good time of chill-out with Dehua and Jinghe last night. Was meant to celebrate my birthday but to me, I recieved more than that. It feels good to be sitting down, with a few like-minded people and just talk about life, experiences, perspectives. Anywhere is fine because the conversation is not restricted by the setting, it goes way beyond. We really delved into the deeper things in life and my mind was engaged. Can't believe we stayed till 115. We were like talking non-stop and totally lost track of time. Dehua shared b4 that my birthday falls in a good period cos it is a festive season but somewhat this year I am experiencing the year-end syndrome (in my own words). Many things to make sense, reconcile, search deep within and move on with a clear mind. Thks for being there!

Photos taken @ The Ark

Photos taken at Vivian's Farewell

Lord I'm Amazed By You

Today I experienced the Grace of God in a very intimate way... To me, the grace of God brings to mind the image of my little finger holding on to His big hand. Underservingly, I hold on to Him.

Things have been moving fast, activity after activity. Though unconsciously I feel I have been doing the right things, I do not have the time to consciously examine the purpose of each activity. In the quiet of the night after the party, I sat thinking about the event that has passed. I am thankful to God for goodhearted people who joined us. Melinda who baked gingerbread man for everyone in the group. Edwin who told me he is glad he is part of us and Brian who offered to help with the logistics even though he is uncertain what is going on. I am genuinely praying in my heart that they will join the CG. Looking at myself, inexperienced and full of weakness yet God chooses to use me and bless me. I can identify with the testimony shared by Meihong how she appear lesser in comparison to her siblings but God gave her a confidence to serve. A song I love came to mind - Amazed.

You danced over me
While I was unaware
You sing all around
But I never hear the sound
Lord I'm amazed by You...
How you love me

Pastor Jeff shared before that when he sings this song, he visualise God as a father watching over a child sound asleep. In God's protection, I feel His love and assurance.

Yes Man

Yes Man is a comedy based on a memoir by Danny Wallace first published in July 2005. According to the book, he describes how he spent six months saying "Yes" to any question or proposal that comes his way in his everyday life. Once again, we see Jim Carrey doing what he does best, making people laugh. Well, for those who are looking for a rolling good time of laughter, catch the show! There are many scenes in the show that will keep you laughing throughout. The acting is great and the plot, hilarious. Though there are some parts which are predictable, the overall show was very entertaining and keeps you waiting for more. I particularly like the scene when he plays the guitar to persuade a man from committing suicide. He was really sincere in an absolutely funny way. Entertaining as it is, it brings forth a principle about life. As the character learns along the way what it means to really live, so do the audience learn and realise it together with him. Carl (Jim) said, "You don't have to do it, you want to do it." While saying Yes to the opportunity presented, we must be true to our heart at the same time. Excellent show!

Review: 4 out of 5 stars

Why Women Cry

A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?""Because I'm a woman," she told him. "I don't understand," he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will." Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?" "All women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say. The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry. Finally he prayed to God who would surely know the answer. When God responded he asked, "God, why do women cry so easily?"

God said: "When I made the woman she had to be made special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort. I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining. Gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly. I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart. I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly. And lastly, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers and only hers exclusively to use whenever she needs it. She needs no reason, no explanation, its hers."

"You see my son," said God, "the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

Meet-up with Dehua @ Kuriya

Met up with Dehua, June and Tracy for a catch-up at Kuriya in Raffles City and we had a good time of laughter and just purely comfortable in one another's presence. These are people who have impacted my life in some ways and friends I hold close to my heart. It's never easy to find people who know your weakness and still able to accept you for who you are but once u find them, hang on to them & never let them go :)

Dehua is a brother I respect and admire for his realness and his genuine interest in the lives of others. He guided me in taking care of people and having a shepherd's heart. I remember distinctly how he encouraged me to join the choir and not be afraid to follow my dreams when I shared my fears to him. I remember him telling me that it is ok to fail, just learn from my mistakes. He taught me what it means to get involved in the life of someone. I am so glad that he and Daisy are together, both people I love and admire. Looking forward to wedding bells ringing :P

June is one of my bestest friend in church as I have always shared to others. She is someone I have been through a lot with in my ministry days in NUS. Amazingly, we have been through many experiences together unique to the 2 of us. This brings us close to each other as we can identify with each other and connect deeply. I love to talk to her and she always makes me laugh. Her big heart and concern for people really touches me. A significant moment was when we went to Cameron Highlands. I vomitted on the bus and was in a mess. She wiped the vomit off me and applied medicated oil for me. I was so touched! She truly reflects the love of Christ. She has seen my ugly side but still love me. A friend I will always keep.

Tracy is another of my bestest friend in church and my sheep as well. We know each other since our JC days. She is someone I am attracted to becos of her bubbly personality and her willingness to go the extra, extra mile for others. She has a soft spot for the underdog and is someone with strong values. I enjoy listening to her share about her experiences and her innermost feelings. I know with certainty that she is someone I can count on in times of trouble and will fend for me when I am being attacked. A significant moment was when she accompany me to repair my handphone. I didn't have to do anything at all as she settled everything for me. I am thankful for this friend who share the same passion as me and understands me well.

A Thankful Heart

I just came back from Northlight School with a child from the Home after registering for her to enroll in the school. Its a vocational school for students whose PSLE results do not qualify for them to enter into the mainstream school. Before that, we had our P6 graduation for all the P6 students who have completed their PSLE. Today God taught me a lesson of patience and thanksgiving to Him in all circumstances.

Our program started with lunch and movie at E2max at Cineleisure afterwhich we will have games and photo-taking. Earlier in the week, I have booked the room from 1130-130pm. However, when we reached the place at 11am, the staff told us that the staff-in-charge has not reached and they are only able to start at 12pm. I was angry as we had already booked the place and I reasoned with the person, but to no avail. After 10 min, the person opened the door for us and allow us to use the room until the staff-in-charge comes. One of the kids came to me and ask me why I appeared so impatient.

Part 1: The staff told us that he can only let us watch the show at 1230pm and we are not able to use the membership card as the discount counter opens only at 4pm. By 1230pm after our games, we chose the dvd and watched the show which turned out to be very appropriate and interesting (Flushed away). This is amazing as we did not know abt the show previously! When we went to the counter to pay after that, the staff told us that it is on the house as they made a mistake. Thank God for that! We had the room to ourselves from 1130 and watched the show, all for free... :) It's not abt the money but the turn in events that reminds me we need to thank God in ALL circumstances.

Part 2: In the cab, on the way to Northlight School...the cab driver got to find out that my student is going to study in a vactional school and he encouraged her to retake her PSLE. We have tried to encourage and persuade her many times but she just does not want to retake her exams. The driver was very persistent and showed genuine concern, sharing with her advice from his personal experiences. When we reached the school, the child told me that she wants to retake her PSLE. When I asked her if she is sure, she looks at me and says, "I am sure." Thanks God for a change of mind.

"Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." - 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Go The Distance

Go The Distance - Michael Bolton (Live) - Funny videos are here

Go The Distance
I have often dreamed of a far off place
Where a hero's welcome would be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer when they see my face
And a voice keeps saying this is where I'm meant to be

I'll be there someday, I can go the distance
I will find my way if I can be strong
I know ev'ry mile will be worth my while
When I go the distance, I'll be right where I belong

Down an unknown road to embrace my fate
Though the road may wander, it will lead me to you
And a thousand years would be worth the wait
It may take a lifetime but somehow I'll see it through

And I won't look back, I can go the distance
And I'll stay on track, No I won't accept defeat
It's an uphill slope but I won't lose hope
Till I go the distance and my journey is complete

But to look beyond the glory is the hardest part
For a hero's strength is measured by his heart

Like a shooting star I can go the distance
I will search the world, I will face its harms
I don't care how far, I can go the distance
Till I find my hero's welcome waiting in your arms...

The Unconditional Love Of God

Today's sermon strike a chord in my heart. The topic is on The Unconditional Love of God. Love of God - A simple truth yet speaks a lot. Pastor Jeff shared that he had been asked to share on the topic of love many times and each time he struggled due to his misconceptions of the meaning of love. The misconceptions are that love is a feeling and that love is uncontrollable. I remember a module I studied in Uni... it's called, " Understanding your emotions." There was a tutorial in which we had a most interesting debate on whether human can live without emotions. The opposition were sure having a hard time and in the end, all agreed that it is impossible. We need to be engaged with our feelings! However, the dangerous part comes when we allow our feelings to take full control of our behaviors. Hence, we need to allow God to be be in control of our thoughts and feelings. Follow our hearts, but follow God first :)

Another thing he shared sets me thinking, "When we realised that Jesus is all that we have left, we realised He is all that we need." I couldn't agree more with this statement. Often times, it is only during the dire moments in life that we treasure what we have. When we reach the state where we question if life is worth living, we talk in terms of need and not want. It's these things that keeps us going. A friend shared with me that his friend, 24 years old, just committed suicide due to a relationship problem. I feel saddened by the fragility of life and the hopelessness that drives people to put an end to it.

A world without God will perish and we need to be people-chasers and be bold to proclaim His gospel to the world. He has come so that we may live life to the full.

"I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." - John 10:10b

Ten Commandments of Friendship

Ten Commandments of Friendship

1. Speak to people – there is nothing as nice as a cheerful word of greeting.
2. Smile at people – it takes seventy-two muscles to frown and only fourteen to smile.
3. Call people by name - the sweetest music to anyone’s ear is the sound of their own name.
4. Be friendly and helpful - if you would have friends, be friendly.
5. Be cordial - speak and act as if everything you do were a real pleasure.
6. Be genuinely interested in people - you can like everyone if you try.
7. Be generous with praise - cautious with criticism.
8. Be considerate of the feelings of others - it will be appreciated.
9. Be thoughtful of the opinions of others.
10. Be alert to give service - what counts most in life is what we do for others!

(Life Management for Busy Women, Chapter 13, pg 177)

Jason's Birthday Celebration @ The Loof

Went to The Loof last night to celebrate Jason's birthday together with Marcus and Tracy. It was my first time there. We wanted to get the outside seats at the rooftop area as it was nicer and have a better view. However, it was packed and we went to the enclosed area instead(far left). From our seats, we were able to view the Raffles Hotel. The seats is cosy and comes with big cushions, dim lighting. They have really friendly waiters as well (the waiter who served us told us that he is the nicest waiter and offered to treat us to drinks if he sees us at Zouk). Overall, good atmoshphere, just that the music is slightly loud.

Marcus ordered the Gummiberry (top right) and we kept teasing him as it sounds like gummy bears. Trac ordered The Loof Life and she was saying she was getting 'a life' lol. Jason ordered a Long Island Tea (his usual) and me a glass of white wine. In the mood for it. I like the gummyberry, quite sweet but taste really good when u drink it from the glass, together with the froth on top. It is a nice blend.

It was a good chill-out and we ended off with some heartfelt sharings and a nice birthday cookie. We also gave him a nice, pink, horizontally-striped polo t-shirt from hush puppies. Look forward to seeing him in it. One step closer to being a metrosexual, brother :P

Photos Taken @ My Cousin's (Terrance) Wedding

Race to the End

Finishing Well - What People Who Really Live Do Differently

Synopsis of the book:
On the edge of a New Frontier...

Author Bob Buford calls them "pathfinders" - individuals for whom age 40 and beyond has been an opportunity to further their significance rather than to rest on their success. They are people who have pioneered the art of finishing well in these modern times, and who can teach us to do the same, starting today. Buford sought out 60 of these trailblazers - including management guru Peter Drucker, leadership mentor Ken Blanchard and philosopher and academic, Dallas Willard - and has recorded their lively conversations in these pages so that they can serve us as "mentors in print" for all of us. Twenty years from now the rules for this second adulthood as a productive season of life may be better known. But for now, we are out across the frontier breaking new ground. Buford gives you a chance to sit at the feet of these pioneers and learn from them about finishing well so that they may shift into a far more fulfilling life now, no matter your age. A life of significance that will be a legacy for future generations too.

I am currently reading this book, "Finishing Well". Through conversations of people who have been there and done that, it provided me a lot of insights into living with a purpose in mind. I felt quite overwhelmed as I flip through the pages as the issues discussed are coming from people who have lived more than half of their lives. It is that kind of feeling that you get when planning for the rest of your days before your death. Make the most of it before it's too late. Yup, tht's the gist!

Dallas talks about the critical difference between success and significance. As stated by him, success is when we are able to control the outcomes whereas significance is achieved when we leave the outcomes to God, trusting that He is in control of all things. "A power beyond our control". He shared about a story about how the dogs are trained in Florida. The dogs are given an electric rabbit to chase after. One day, the electric rabbit broke down and the dogs, at a loss what to do, started yelping and bting one another. They are in the state of confusion. Dallas asks, "What is the rabbit in our lives?"

Following from the story shared, the dogs were disillusioned as the rabbit broke down. This was probably because it was what they did not expect. The things that we do and invest in, how many of these things actually last? It's easier to invest in something which the outcomes are clear or at least appears clear to us but many a times, it may not be what meets the eyes. Are we willing to throw ourselves into the sea of uncertainty for something we believe in and yet is not sure of the outcomes.

As I look at the year ahead, there are many committments and new things to embrace. I ask myself, am I ready for all these. Didn't I want all this? What is happening now...cold feet? Perhaps I want to take on more without letting go of others. Preparation work is needed! I tell myself but how much preparation work is enough, I do not know. I have not been there and done that. However, I want to commit all my outcomes to God and SURRENDER.

The Road Less Travelled

The Road Less Travelled - Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood;
And sorry I could not travel both;
And be one traveler, Long I stood,
And looked down one as far as I could,
To where it bent in the undergrowth.
Then took the other as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim;

Because it was grassy and wanted wear.
Though as for that, the passing there,
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay,
In leaves no step had trodden black;
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet, knowing how way leads onto way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh,
Somewhere ages and ages hence;
Two roads diverged in a wood,
And I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference

My Records of Blessings

My Records of Blessings

I am so glad to get my mini notebook - FINALLY! It feels good to be typing on it now :) I thank God for the cheap price I got it at and also people who has helped me. Ruisheng who went with me and helped me check meticulously the parts and Charlie who helped me to refund the microsoft office which I do not need and I saved $109. I am most thankful for my brother who helped me source out the laptop, compare the prices and gave me much valuable advices!Indeed, I am blessed.

This morning I was so tired when I went to work and wanted desperately to get a cup of coffee to keep me going... but was so busy the moment I stepped into office that I did not have time for that. After that rushed into the meeting, I felt extremely sleepy. However, the devotion shared captured by attention as it was on forgiveness which was aligned with the sermon by Pastor Jeff yesterday on the forgiving heart of God. I felt God's presence with me, though still sleepy, I knew he was present.

I went for my last lesson of Project Smile today. We learnt a few more tricks and practise on previous tricks. Maybe cos I m a slow learner or I am not in form today, it took me quite a while to get it. Thank God for this guy sitting next to me who guided me and taught me till I understood. There is an uncle who passed around a packet of sweets for everyone too. Even though I am not able to go for the community session this Sat as I got to attend a wedding, I am looking 4ward 2 other chances of serving the community thr this way. When I reached home, I performed my first magic trick on my brother. He was so skeptical but I still succeeded. So glad!

I thank God also for friends in my life who are there for me. I am so touched by June and Trac. Today Trac told me that she only has one day of leave left for the year and she hopes to have the honor to spend it with me. Wow, I shld be honored. Mani guys will be dying 4 this :P Also spent the night b4 on the phone w June for long hrs. I thank God 4 this fren I can share deeply with. She is such a gd listener. I was also blessed by Wei who told me over msn tht she managed to bridge into spiritual conversation with her frens. I am so proud of her :) Thank God 4 Leanchoo aso who asked me when I am free to meet up. I really thk God for her availability.

Tmr I am gg for my interview for my masters in counseling and I thk God for that as well, also a chance to take leave for the day. A break. I am aso thkful for the tuition assignment that Trac told me she has on hand who can help me to support part of my studies for next year.

God, I pray that you sustain me in the journey ahead. I believe it will be tough, like the narrow road ahead. There are sacrifices to be made, hardships to endure but whenever I feel discouraged and want to give up, may I look back at this blog entry and be thkful to u for all u have blessed me with! I will be still, know You are God.