The Boy In The Striped Pajamas

This is a movie adapted from John Boyne's novel on a forbidden friendship between a eight-year-old German boy and a Jewish concentration camp prisoner in World War II-era Germany. The show bring us through the friendship of this 2 boys which is touching as they break past the barriers of their differences and defying the rules set by the adults. As they engage in their innocent and genuine friendship, little did they know the reality of the larger context and what is soon to happen to them. You will be drawn to the boy, Breuno who has beautiful blue eyes and such an intense look. It has a sad and disturbing ending which is quite abrupt and leaves the audience hanging dry. The reality hits real deep, makes you think about what the extent of inhumanity people can resort to. It made me cringe in my seat.

A man in a silly red sheet

I realised something about myself today...I am an extroverted introvert. This is the term used by 1 of my coursemates. It describes people who are naturally introverts who act like extroverts due to circumstances.

No wonder I am bushed! 2 straight days of being 'fully present' (almost) with a group of people bursting to share about their lives in a continuous fashion. Wow, this is a feat for an introvert like me! Not to mention the assignment deadline looming. I close my eyes, tell myself it's a dream. I open my eyes. To my dismay, nope... it's not a dream. Arghh....Come on Jiayan, you can do it! Keep going!

My heart kind of resonated with the heartcry of Superman in this song now... Do not confuse external victories with the inner victories, search deeper within. It's not about the silly red sheet we wear. It's our heart that matters to God :)

Im only a man in a silly red sheet

Digging for kryptonite on this one way street

Only a man in a funny red sheet

Looking for special things inside of me

Inside of me

Inside me

Yeah, inside me

Inside of me

(Superman Song)

Playdoh Time!

Today's module was on expression through art. We were all asked to draw two pictures, one symbolising a good thing and the other bad. The class came up with some really nice pictures. Playoh time after that...We had to mold something which is our adversary and then our strengths to counter these adversery. I am amazed by the creativity of my class...Some of their works in the pictures below. Guess which are mine? :P

Enjoy The Journey

Gave a training this morning on, "Companioning Children Using Creative Methods." When my boss heard the title, she said, " Sounds quite wordy". Oops.. haha.. it's ok. The content is more improtant, I thought. The training, I'm glad I managed to pull it off. I find myself enjoy doing this very much. Doing the presentation slides and explaining of the concepts, giving examples. I enjoyed every moment of it :D As part of the training, I get them to draw about a recent experience with a child in the Home or a childhood experience. After that, they have to "companion" one another through the session of sharing their experiences. At the end of the session, we had a debrief.

All shared that they had a good time and that it was good to take a step back from work to engage themselves in some time for themselves. A colleague said, "It was a very therapeutic experience". There were lotsa laughter, good interaction among the colleagues. Afterall, when else can u have such a time with your boss..hee hee.. and learn about her childhood experience.

The clearer the vision, the lesser the options, the better the decision. I feel clearer that training is an area I enjoy. The interaction in a group setting, facilitation, sharing of experiences. I pray for opportunities to come!

Scissor-cut Curry Rice - Yummy

Random Thoughts

Love this photo..so encapturing..

Too much of something, even when it's something you like can be .... :( Making my tea and thinking of my work at the same time, i unconsciously put 2 sachets of earl grey tea into the cup and I was like..how come it looks so thick? As I looked clearly, I realised there are 2 sachets..oops.. no choice, had to suffer the consequence of my carelessness. Every sip I took was torturous. So bitter. Yucks. Maybe it's the tea. Now I am feeling pretty restless and wierd. Start thinking about the events that passed recently. The commemoration of Pastor Jeff On Saturday, doing my assignment on Sunday, trying to hand in my assignment on Monday... it's been quite a while since I experienced stress of this kind, as a student. If anyone is to ask me if I prefer to work or to study, I would definitely say work. I do, however, love the social interactions among my classmates and hearing them share their work and views. The assignment part and lecture part I really dread.. The commemoration brings back lots of flashback from the past of Pastor Ben. Though glad for him, a sense of loss crept in. Was touched by Pastor Jeff's speech and his sincerity. I believe that God will use him greatly. Just like how he used Joshua. To obey is better than sacrifice. This song during the worship really touched me. Though I have listened to it before and liked it. Singing it this time felt different and touched me deeply.

I give my all to you
Send me and I will go for you
To the ends of the earth
I'll follow after you
I want the world to know
Your love endures forever

Tell me and i'll obey
This is far greater than sacrifice
Trusting you and not myself
Will always lead to blessing
Lord have your way in me
Not my will, yours be done

Here i stand within your presence
Longing for your touch
A thousand days cannot compare
To one day in your courts

Hold me now
And never ever let me go
My jesus, my precious saviour
I'm forever yours

I will worship you forever
I will worship you

Life in all its colours

As I look at these lovely pictures, I can't help but be in awe of our God, the creator of all things!

BLUE

A well-lighted igloo on an artic night

A polar bear leaping from an iceberg (My FAV)

RED

Water in a red Creek Bed

A Maple Tree with Red Leaves

PURPLE

Sunset and Bridge

Giant Purple Egg at Edinburg Festival

GREEN

Two Silhouette Cyclists on a nightime street

Two Tree-frogs staring nose to nose

BROWN

Bear Sticking Out Its Tongue

Floodwater Patterns Preserved in Thick Mud

YELLOW

Vintage Yellow Car in Hawaii

Woman with Yellow Scarf

ORANGE

Close-up of Orange Tulips

Birds and Orange Sky at Sunset

40 Inspirational speeches from movies

Slumdog Millionaire

The next show I am going to catch...

Synopsis:

Today is the biggest day in Jamal Malik's life.

A penniless, eighteen year-old orphan from the slums of Mumbai, he's one question away from winning a staggering 20 million rupees on India's "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?" But when the show breaks for the night, suddenly, he is arrested on suspicion of cheating. After all, how could an uneducated street kid possibly know so much? Determined to get to the bottom of Jamal's story, the jaded Police Inspector spends the night probing Jamal's incredible past, from his riveting tales of the slums where he and his brother Salim survived by their wits to his hair-raising encounters with local gangs to his heartbreak over Latika, the unforgettable girl he loved and lost.

Each chapter of Jamal's increasingly layered story reveals where he learned the answers to the show's seemingly impossible quizzes. But one question remains a mystery: what is this young man with no apparent desire for riches really doing on the game show?

When the new day dawns and Jamal returns to answer the final question, the Inspector and sixty million viewers are about to find out...

Scribblings

Here are some of my scribblings in the beginning of the year, during my QT moment at Austin hill resort when I was having my dmm retreat. Looking at the golf course in front of me, I started scribbling....

Our Christian life is like the slopes, up and down. Sometimes, we go up and sometimes down but eventually we know that we are traveling on God's turf and because of that, we can be secure and assured. Sometimes, we fall into the lake and we struggle. If we struggle even longer until we finally collect our senses, ask God for peace and try to deal with the situation by keeping our bodies afloat, this means that we must be willing to be in the water and face the discomfort until we can get out of it. As the same time, we understand that such situations does occur and we do not need to be surprised. In God, we can have the faith to come out of the water. As we move on in the journey with the destination in mind, let us not forget to stop and smell the roses. Appreciate the good things in life and thank the people who are in the journey together. Lend a hand to someone not because you have to but because you want to. These are your motivations and strengths to keep you going when you are at your lowest. Sometimes, you get lost and you wonder if you will ever get there. The road ahead looks uncertain and scary. You wonder if you should take the next step. Your logic tells you to weigh the cost and calculate the risks. You spend so much time doing that and it gets dark. You are even more lost and fearful to move on. You miss out on the good things God wanted to give you. But move on because God has a great plan for you. He has better things ahead...

My Mother

A picture I drew of my mother when I was younger....

I love this petite and feisty woman in my life, I admire her for her courage, her determination and her faithfulness, I respect her for her love, her diligence and her resilience, I get intimidated by her forcefulness, her bluntness and her invading into my private space, I am amazed by her perfectionistic nature, her persuasiveness and her health-consciousness.

When I see her bite into that raw celery, I cannot believe she is enjoying it. When I see her change from clothes after clothes, I get bored and wonder when she is done. She seems to take forever to get ready. I hear her on the phone and I wonder when she'll stop talking. It seems like a phone marathon. She can watch a video of herself over and over and over again and not get tired. You will never catch her with a toothy grin as she doesn't like to smile with her teeth showing, she does not like her teeth. She can spend hours painting her nails and clean it away right after that cos it does not look right. When she sits in a car, she will always stable herself with the handle even if the car is moving slowly. She can repeat herself many times so that you will never forget what she says. She likes to be seen, to be heard, to be known. She speaks funny english but this doesn't stop her from trying. It can get really hilarious sometimes. She is obsessed with smsing. She just love to figure it out even though it's challenging for her. Hard on the outside but soft on the inside.

Beautiful on both the inside and the outside.

The 2 communication Styles

I find this pretty interesting...

There are two styles of communication, Emotional talking style & Logical talking style.

People with the Emotional talking style use words to express their own feelings and what they feel from another person. This talking style use a stream of consciousness to express and release emotional states. Feelings guide this talking style. While these people may be logical in their mental processes to do a job or to function in the world, their Emotional talking style will determine how they connect with another person in a close relationship. Having the same style of communication in a relationship provides an important tool for working out personality differences.

People with an Emotional Communication Style often drop hints about what they desire. They do not think it's necessary to be more specific because they're able to pick up on the nuances of what other people say, and they assume everyone can. Yet people with the Logical Communication Style need you to say what you mean. They don't want guesswork; they want directness and clarity. Result: ambiguity and conflict.

People with an Emotional Communication Style take time making decisions. They need to figure out how they feel, and this isn't always cut and dried, so they do not like to be rushed through the process. That can come across to the Logical Communication Style person as being dimwitted or indecisive: "Can't you just look at the facts and decide? How complicated could that be?" Result: condescension and conflict.

People with an Emotional Communication Style see the Logical Communication Style as being hyper-intellectual, out of touch with feelings. "All those people do is think, think and think some more." Someone with an Emotional Communication Style wants you to feel what's behind the words, which is the most important part of the communication. Someone with a Logical Communication Style takes the words at face value, analyzing the meaning of each one and deriving a total meaning from the sum of those parts. For instance, one person says, "I hate you," meaning, in the Emotional Communication Style, "My feelings about this are so big that I need to express myself forcefully." Once said, that releases the emotion, and it's over. However, in the Logical Communication Style, this means it's time to starts packing the bags. Hate=no love=the relationship is over. Result: miscommunication and conflict.

People with Logical talking style use words according to their dictionary definitions. They lay the words out like they are building a brick wall. They ask many questions to make sure they understand so there are no holes in the wall. They don't like loose ends or assumptions. The background or circumstances of a situation can be as important as the event itself to the logical talking style person. They are natural born problem solvers and often have good mechanical skills. The logical talking style relates only to how a person uses words to communicate. These people may have an emotional or sensitive nature but that is a different consideration from their talking style.

The person with a Logical Communication Style often stops the person with an Emotional Communication Style to clarify what's been said. The questions are reasonable in the Logical Communication Style. However, the questions break the stream of consciousness that's characteristic of the Emotional Communication Style, which follows feelings, not reason. In the Emotional Communication Style, a person just wants the opportunity to express emotion without interruption. Yet the person with a Logical Style wants it to make sense. Result: frustration and conflict.

The person with a Logical Communication Style often seems authoritative to someone with an Emotional Communication Style. People with an Emotional Communication Style can feel put down by the Logical Communication Style and may respond by being insulting, perceiving that they are responding in kind. In a long-term relationship between people with mismatched Communication Styles, you can hear strain or urgency in the voice of the person with an Emotional Communication Style as he or she is constantly on the defensive, trying to maintain some sense of equality. Result: stress and conflict.

Different Styles of Communication can leads to:
* Misunderstandings and overiding irritation with one another
* Significant energy drain
* Different friends and interests
* Difference sense of humour

http://www.matchmatrix.com/Public/UnderstandingYourMatchMatrix/Conflicts/index.cfm#communication_icon

The 5 coping Stances

Today's lesson is on personal issues...yup, personal issues which we as counselors are grappling with which might hinder us in our sessions with a client. How comfortable are we in facing these issue and in facing discomfort. I will not elaborate on the sharings due to confidentiality. However, I will still share one thing I learnt about. The lecturer asked a question which is not easy to answer: " How do we deal with discomfort?"

According to Virginia Satir, humans have 5 coping stances:

(1) Blaming (focus on self & context)

(2) Placating (focus on others & context)

(3) Super-reasonable/ rational (focus on context)

(4) Irrelevant (focus on neither)

(5) Congruent (Balancing self, others and context)

Two Peas in A pod?

1 day to Valentine's Day and I've already been hearing many interesting stories of how people get together... Here's one news article of such a story of a 32 year-old woman who married a 21 year-old guy (sent to me by Alexis):

My hubby is no Mummy's boy
THREE weeks ago, my husband was the one who "popped", even though I am the pregnant party. By "popped", I am referring to his Passing Out Parade, the coming-of-age experience familiar to Singaporean males aged 18 and above. The parade is meant to symbolise their transformation from mere recruits to trained soldiers. Being married to a full-time national serviceman, I was invited to witness the auspicious graduation ceremony and had an "amusing" time.

And so, a 32-weeks-pregnant, 32-year-old me waddled onto Pulau Tekong to watch the love of my life (who is 12 years younger than me) prance about on a parade square with a rifle. While trying to spot my husband in the crowd of camouflage greens, someone behind me called out. "Excuse me, are you Miss Ismail?" cried a voice, referring to me by my maiden name.
I turned around and came face-to-face with a former student who I used to teach English Literature. Five years ago, when I was still marking essays at one of the nation's top secondary schools, he was in white uniform shorts and with a side-parting combed by his mother. I was therefore amazed to see him wearing a red beret and a couple of rank insignias on his epaulettes.

Although I was happy to see him, I had a sinking feeling. The discomfort was exacerbated by his next question: "So, Ma'am, who are you here to see?" I watched his expression as I replied: "My husband." It was a surreal experience, to say the least. To his credit, he quickly quelled his surprise and we continued to talk about other things: His plans to go to university and how he cannot wait to complete his own national service. He pointed out to three other former students of mine, who were sergeants or officers in charge of the recruits.

When my husband, D, finally finished his show of might and strength, he joined me on the terrace and I introduced him to the boys as my husband. As they acknowledged him, I sensed their latent curiosity.The top questions may have been: Why did she choose him? How did they meet? What were they thinking? I was struck by how topsy turvy it seemed. His supervisors are my former students, only 20 years old and not yet in university, yet they far outrank him. D, an expectant father and a newly-wed husband, is in a category far removed from them, and certainly has more to think about than, say, his Playstation Portable-toting bunkmates, who make plans to go clubbing or drinking as soon as they have permission to book out. So, it is somewhat depressing to know that my man is subject to the authority and decisions of those who cannot possibly understand his needs.

Although I was happy to run into my former students at the parade for my man, I was a little testy when I looked at the feedback forms included in the goody bags at the Parade that day. Beginning with "Dear Parent...", it assumed that all NSFs are still tied to their mummies' apron strings. Sometimes, it doesn't take national service to turn boys into men. I'm proud to say that some, like D, already are.
http://multimedia.asiaone.com/Multimedia/Vodcast/Just%2BWoman/Story/A1Multimedia20081027-4732.html

Another is my colleage who is an Indian. I saw 7 roses on her desk and teased her. It was given to her by her husband this morning. They had just gotten married a month ago. I asked her where they will be going tomorrow and she shared that they will be watching their first movie together and I was a tad surprised. They met each other in 2007 at a wedding and he took a liking to her. He expressed interest in her but she did not feel the same way. After that, they did not keep in contact for 1 year and were busy with their own lives. When they met up during Deepavali one year later, he decided to pursue her again and there and then, they decided to get engaged after 2 hours of talking. During their first date, they were already discussing about marriage. In her words, "Before, I would never have thought that this can happen. I told myself that I am prepared not to be married and then he appeared." "We are really similar and we can talk about almost everything." Oh ya, forgot to mention, their first meeting dates back to their childhood days when she was 7 and he 10. He asked her for a dance and she refused. Isn't that cute, how their relationship has evolved since :P

I am bowled over..haha

Please Think with your heart

I am surprised how people can sometimes make decisions regarding humans through a mathematical permutation, or so it seems (to me).

My student came back to the Home with his handbook : "XXX lost his Maths Workbook. Please buy a new one for him, it costs $4.15. " I gave the child the money and sent him to school. He came back with a change of $1 and said that his teacher has written the price wrongly. The book costs $3.15, instead of $4.15. Hence, I called the teacher to ask him and his answer to me was, " I might have written wrongly." I said to him, "Please check the price for me." He replied, "If the book costs $4.15, I will call you. If the book costs $3.15, I will not call you." Ok, fair enough.

I brought up to him another matter and said that I found a new NIKE wallet on the child which he said he bought in the school bookshop for $1.50. I verified this with the teacher. The teacher said to me, " If the wallet is not sold in the bookshop, I will call you. If the wallet is sold in the bookshop, I will not call you."

I replied him, " Can you just give me a call anyway?"

Thinking out loud: If you care enough for the child, you will call me. If you don't care enough for him, you will not call me.

The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button

Synopsis:
"I was born under unusual circumstances." And so begins 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button,' adapted from the 1920s story by F. Scott Fitzgerald about a man who is born in his eighties and ages backwards: a man, like any of us, who is unable to stop time. We follow his story, set in New Orleans from the end of World War I in 1918, into the 21st century, following his journey that is as unusual as any man's life can be. Directed by David Fincher and starring Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett with Taraji P. Henson, Tilda Swinton, Jason Flemyng, Elias Koteas and Julia Ormond, 'Benjamin Button,' is a grand tale of a not-so-ordinary man and the people and places he discovers along the way, the loves he finds, the joys of life and the sadness of death, and what lasts beyond time.



Memorable Quotes:

Benjamin Button: [Voice over; letter to his daughter] For what it's worth: it's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.

Mrs. Maple: Benjamin, we're meant to lose the people we love. How else would we know how important they are to us?

Benjamin Button: Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss.

Daisy: We all end up in diapers.

TAT

A new psychological test I learnt in class today - TAT (Thematic Apperception Test)...

The TAT is popularly known as the picture interpretation technique because it uses a standard series of 30 provocative yet ambiguous pictures about which the subject must tell a story. In the case of adults and adolescents of average intelligence, a subject is asked to tell as dramatic a story as they can for each picture, including:

- what has led up to the event shown
- what is happening at the moment
- what the characters are feeling and thinking, and
- what the outcome of the story was.

Here are some examples of the pictures used for the test:

Mirror mirror on the wall

"You cannot love another person from a false self. You cannot love another while you are still hiding. How can you help them to freedom while you remain captive? You cannot love another unless you offer her your heart. It takes courage to live from your heart. My friend Jenny said just the other day, “I desperately want to be who I am. I don’t want the glory that I marvel at in others anymore. I want to be that glory which God set in me.”

Finally, our deepest fear of all . . . we will need to live from it. To admit we do have a new heart and a glory from God, to begin to let it be unveiled and embrace it as true—that means the next thing God will do is ask us to live from it. Come out of the boat. Take the throne. Be what he meant us to be. And that feels risky . . . really risky. But it is also exciting. It is coming fully alive. My friend Morgan declared, “It’s a risk worth taking.” (Waking the Dead - The Glory of a Heart Fully Alive, John)

In order to truly be able to love others, we have to first be truly able to love ourselves which means embracing ourselves for who we are. To meet with our greatest fears, our weaknesses, our ugliness and baring before God, asking Him to purify us. How comfortable are we with the person we face in the mirror daily?

"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." - Psalm 51:17

Spring of Life

The song that see me through my down moments in uni days...

Spring Of Life - Hillsong Australia

Quotes on Gratefulness

"At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us."
-Albert Schweitzer

“God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say "thank you?"
-William A. Ward

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.”
-William Arthur Ward

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God;-The Bible Phil 4:6 NKJV

Be thankful for what you have and you will end up having more. But if you concentrate on what you don't have, you'll never, ever have enough.
- Oprah Winfrey

If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are more blessed than the million who will not survive the week.If you have food in your refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof over your head and a place to sleep, you are richer than 75 percent of the world.If you have money in the bank or in your wallet, you are among the top 80 percent of the worlds wealthy.If you hold up your head with a smile on your face and are truly thankful, you are blessed because the majority can, but most do not.
- Author Unknown

I'm thankful for a pair of shoes that feel really good on my feet; I like my shoes.I'm thankful for the birds; I feel like they're singing just for me when I get up in the morning... Saying, 'Good morning, John. You made it, John.'I'm thankful for the sea breeze that feels so good right now, and the scent of jasmine when the sun starts going down.I'm thankful...
- Johnny Cash
American Country Western Singer

Weiwei on magazine cover

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