Freshness

Freshness

Saturday, February 27, 2010

God - Our protector

The thought of doing something out of the norm gives me a kind of thrill (not something morally wrong of cos) and liven my senses. It brings me out of the humdrum of everyday life. Of cos, it's not like "chasing after the wind" till I get myself lost and aimless. It's just that an occasional change in routine can bring out the creativity in us or rather what as Freud says, bringing the "unconscious" part of ourselves into awareness. While this is true, I realised it does not apply to all areas of my life especially in the area of relationships with others. This is a tricky area and needs to be handle with care. Sometimes I marvel at people around me who are courageous in their expression of love as I think it takes a lot of vulnerability and putting themselves on the line. It takes real authencity to be so honest with oneself so I salute them :) In a world of secret alliances, hidden agendas and lack of transparency, people have learnt the art of hiding their real emotions and locking their hearts well. However, such willingness to go against the norm of wanting to protect oneself can only be motivated by love. As pator Jo says, love can never be used as a weapon. Its function is only to heal and restore. I hope that as God's love fills me more each day, I may also be able to allow myself to be placed at that position of weakness so that His strength may be evident in my weakness.

Let God do the protection and not ourselves.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Bottom zero to sky high

I was having my self-doubts as I spoke to Trac and told her that my client called to cancel the appointment. I was feeling a sense of insecurity that it was something that I said during the session which was not right...But, I felt that the session went well, so what was wrong?

- Was it the advice I dispense?
- Was I being too directive?
- Was it because she did not feel comfortable with me?

All these questions were just flooding my mind and being the person I am, I kept asking the staff whether the client said why she cancel the appointment. She was also clueless as to why. So, I had to bear with the ambiguity and moved on.

This morning, I contacted the staff and she gave me the number of the client saying, "I thought that you might want to call her back." I was slightly apprehensive when calling her back as I dun wan the diplomatic answer which is a hidden form of rejection or worst, an outright critisim. Regardless, I braved the possible outcome and called her. She picked up the phone and I was surprised she could recognise my voice and immediately apologized that she was busy and could not make it. She shared that the techniques I taught her was very helpful and he followed it. She said that she did not have to shout at him. She also said that he wants to come for the next session again.

I cannot further express how elated I felt. It's like whoa...from bottom zero to sky high my spirits was. It worked! And all my fears and doubts were dispel. We made an appointment for next week and yep, she will continue to come and meet me. My prayers were answered, thank you God for your assurance, at a time I wondered whether all my sessions are just going to be once-off.

简单但却很真实。

A life worth living

An unexamined life is not worth living - Socrates

A life __________ is not worth living - (you)

What will your answer look like? :)

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

機器人- 謝佳燕

I have finally completed my essay, behind the deadline by two days. What a record for myself, the worst so far. I sure hope that this lateness does not continue. It has been so hectic ever since my internship began and I was just trying to catch my breath again and again. It doesn't feel that bad this time round though cos I had "hit my wall" a few times before last year, having stayed back till the wee hours at work. The past two days, history repeated itself. I feel like I can make my workplace my second home already haha. The bad thing however, is that, when I get stressed, I will keep munching on all the junk food, searching for stuff in the cupboards (*grinz) I feel like a walking zombie sometimes when I walk out of that office haha...

Sometimes I liken my life now to a game of tetris. The level gets higher and it becomes tougher to get to the next round. I am struggling to keep my senses alert and if I do stop for a moment, I am just afraid that all the blocks will topple all over one another. I thank God truly for the people at my attachment place. They are such a bunch of warm and genuine people. They make my short stays there very enjoyable and not forgetting to mention that they are so open about their lives. I love to listen to their sharings on their love stories, their sidelines, their secret talents, their family... basically their life outside of work.

It's already been two weeks, 16 more weeks to the end of semester one. I have started my red bull drinking regime. Again. Tonight is going to be rest day though I was supposed to meet June but I realised I am not a 機器人 (though sometimes I secretly wished I am) Then I will not be suffering from all the physcial and mental tiredness and emotional distress, as I told Tracy and June.

I look forward to the many things ahead in spite of busyness ( I make it sound like a disease haha):

- Break tonight
- Birthday celebration with DeHua this Friday
-  Tracy's birthday celebration
- Combined CG @ Pulai Springs
- Priscilla's water baptsim
- And the next break whenever it is :D

dear God, only you can truly understand :)

Monday, February 22, 2010

Teach me to love you for who you are

So many things to do yet so little time and so little motivation. The feeling's coming back again. I used to think that if I continue long enough, the experience will get the better of me and I will be more efficient and better at it. I guess some things just dun work that way. I am feeling tired, stuck and wishing that things can be all done in a moment when I snap my finger. I need some boosters from God: Go Go Go!!!

The prophecy yesterday brought tears to my eyes:

"God, teach us to love you for who you are and not what you do"

It resounds in me over and over again. I have been guilty of treating God as a genie and when I do not get what I want, I tend to reply on my own strength. God, help me to know you deeply again ...


Friday, February 19, 2010

Smile

Thank God for the session today :)


Smile and the world smiles with you...

Thursday, February 18, 2010

My first day at my placement

Finally have time to blog :)

Work has been piling and piling since I am back at work this morning.

I want to give thanks to God for the first session at my placement yesterday. There were at least 4 people whom I know. One of them someone I worked on a case together with, another my classmate from NUS, yet another someone I met during a course and Jiaxiang's coursemate (met him at Yating's wedding).

I really thank God that my client came and on the dot. This is amazing because I thought that I was going to lag behind as my other coursemate doing her internship in the same place started on 5th Feb while I only started yesterday. However, she said there were so many no shows that so far she has only seen a client. I was thankful that despite the many no shows in the place, I still managed to get a responsible client. I have another this Friday and I am looking forward to it.

The people are very nice and kind to me. Also, I have a fantastic supervisor. He is encouraging, knowledgeable, gentle, charismatic and caring. While I have only 7 hours of supervision designated for me, he says that he will meet me every week. How nice! He came and said to me, "Can I catch you for 2 minutes?" to go through a case with me after my supervision. I was truly impressed cos I thought that has always been my initiative instead of my boss'. At 6pm, he came into the office asking everyone to leave. talking about work-life-balance, I told him that he make a good boss. I really look forward to learning from him.

The days to come looks positive to me :P Though the assignment deadline coming Really Soon!!!

I made this last night instead of doing my assignment (oopss)...so proud of myself  hehe

Saturday, February 13, 2010

A year of new beginnings

Yesterday's sermon talks about love which turns a house into a home. It is certainly not an unfamiliar theme to most people. Afterall, it has been frequently quoted that, "Home is where the heart is", especially when this year's CNY falls on valentine's day makes it an even more appropriate theme. While it is easy to say, the doing part is far from easy.As pastor has aptly said, application carries much more weight than the thought. Thought alone can only carry a relationships this far but actions always speaks louder than words. At least that is what I think.

This year New Year will begin with me bringing 2 kids from my Home to my house. I am still still thinking of the program later as i am waiting for them to come. I am looking forward though as the past years experience tells me that this interaction will brings the relationship to a closer extent. I bought so much clothes that I was just spending two hours trying to pack my wardrobe but looking at the result, it was worth the effort after all :)

Lots to look forward in the coming months and loads of hard work too. But it is overall a good feeling cos it feels like things are going on the right track and it is beginning to materialise after all the planning and preparation work. My first client at the FSC will be meeting me for a session right after new year then my assignment due date. There is a new brother in the CG (Kim) and a not so new already sister (Huiqi). I thank God for the additions as it reminds me of the bible passage that says, the Lord adds on to them daily those who are being saved. I really thank God for a few friends (bro and sis) who encouraged me when I was down and supported me during this period. I am excited on the book series we are going to embark on, the new chemistry in the group. I am also excited to be a jie mei for my ex-colleague in april (second time).

I really have to call this the year of new beginnings :)

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

My first Bali Trip

Today is the last day of our trip in Bali and I am at Tanaya Bed & Breakfast now, waiting to go to Tanah Lot, the famous temple in Bali. Hopefully we (June and I) will be able to catch the sunset :) Yesterday's sunset @ Kuta beach was not that spectacular, probably due to the constant rain before that. However, it was a beautiful sight to see all the surfers going at the waves, again and again. The waves was great for surfing. Instead of sipping pineapple juice or anything like that, we bought cup noodles and coffee/milo. Haha and I realised I get a headache without coffee. June says I am hooked :P

First day which was supposedly Friday did not happen. I couldnt find my old passport and was not able to collect my new passport at the Immigrations. What a boo boo and June sacrificially postponed the flight to the next day so we can travel there together. I really thank God for her :) And also thank God for the counter staff at the airport who waivered the cost for postponing the trip (I saved on almost $200 phew...)

First night, which was second night actually brought us to the rustic hotel, Taman Harum which June finds very beautiful and I find kinda scary as we walked in there in the dark, with all the statues in the garden (later on I get used to it as you see it everywhere else in Bali). A small but cosy room with a mosquito net covering the beds. There we were, first night in Ubud, Bali finally :) The long awaited stay.


Outside the room


Below are the views outside our rooms :) The statues which I find scarrryyy....


The swimming pool which is right in front of a large paddi field :)


Our sumptuous breakfast...


The day began with shopping, shopping and lotsa shopping. We got some pretty good bargains and bought quite a lot of clothes and stuff. Talking about Chinese New Year shopping. Lotsa of bargaining going on, using the calculation as our main form of negotiation for the price. The locals will usually give us the final price we want, saying that it's for good luck as it's bad luck to turn away a customer.

There were no mirrors so we took turns to take pictures of each other to see how we look :)

Ate at the famous Ibu Okar which sells their famous suckling pig - babi guling



The people have crackers with every meal haha

Their teh which taste like our herbal tea hee, nothing like the teh we order @ our kopitiam :P

We got to find out later on that it costs a lot to raise a pig in Ubud and a pig can be sold for millions of rupee when it grows up. That's why the dish is so popular. Every family needs at least a pig which is required for a wedding or a funeral and they rear their pigs so big that it can feed  a hundred! We love the people, they are VERY warm and polite. We love the food, especially the tea (the ginger tea which we managed to get the recipe. We love the culture, the architecture is beautiful, paintings are everywhere.

I was captured by the picture, the look was simply mesmerising...

The locals bathing by the river...They were just clad in sarong, in full view of passerbys...

We love the scenery, though we din get to see the nice view of Kintamani (the volcano), we saw the lovely rice terrance which can be harvested every 3 months. The first time that the volcano erupted was in 1963 which created the lake we were caneoing on :) When a volcano is going to erupt, the villages will first experience earth tremors so they will start to evacuate the place.


Our canoes :) There are many storage spaces within to put our camera, mineral water etc ...


It was drizzling so we had to put on these cute ponchos which comes with the pants too...cute ah

Poor June, she had 2 mosquito bites on her face...
The temple by the Lake Batur...

The fish farm. We got some bread and threw it into the water but sadly, not fish came up...
Some locals doing fishing by the lake...


Our lovely lunch, the fish was super fresh...


The majestic volcano which was covered by mist due to the rain...

June with Rachel, our guide for the day :)
She's a real cool lady, iron lady I say...
The rice terrace. Rachel told us that we can get an affordable meal at the hut (left of the picture) and sit there the whole day. I wish....It's so lovely :)
The paddi fields. The woman hard at work...

After the lunch was facial and then more shopping and lovely dinner at their restaurant.We had the famous Nasi Campur and crispy duck. Yummy. And the to-die-for cake - Death by chocolate.


The famous crispy duck...

Nasi Campur

Death by chocolate...


Look at how satisfied June is :P Yeah, we finished all the food!!!!

Everywhere you go, you see women carrying stuff on their heads. From their luggage to sand used for construction, you see them balancing the things very well. This is because women are trained from young to carry the offerings (which is very heavy) into the temples and hence, their sense of balance is fantastic. While it is a patriarchal society, the women is bali are very important. They carry offering, take care of the children and work in the fields. i really have to salute them :)The people are very superstitious people and are extremely faithful in their offerings. You see offerings every few steps you go in boxes made from pandang leaves with biscuits and flowers.


Yesterday, we went canoeing in the rain and the mist practically covered any nice scenery we could probably see. Cos this is the rainy season so we have to come back again during their warm season in mid of the year. The lake is said to be crystal blue and the mountains different colours under the sky. We fed the ducks though and get to visit the villages where the ingenious balinese stay (the 'forgotten' ones who are the northern balinese who are poorer). The children who took the clothes given by the tour guide were so estatic, as though it's a treasure. This is indeed a far cry from the kids here in Singapore, even those staying in a children's Home.

More to await ...

In Tanah Lot which is the temple on the rock, we saw lotsa people there. Well, while our agenda was to witness the beautiful sunset, we were so carried away with shopping that we almost missed it! Shopping and women :P It was a lovely place and time passes almost so quickly and before we know it, the sky was dark and we had to head to the airport for our trip back to Singapore.


I bought 2 mousepad that talks about the lifestyle and customs in Bali. It was really cute :) a person in bali sleeps in the day, surf (not the net but real surfing) in the afternoon and drinks beer at night haha. There are simply so many beaches over here and the waves were amazing! Many people who go there just to surf, it was a spectacular sight.


A sweet and beautiful moment :)


A guy chatting June up :P

Just renting a motor bike at 30000 ruppee for a day,you can travel around the place easily but one has to be truly skilled cos the traffic is certainly not easy to manuvouer around. There are many rules to follow such as the drivers at the right lane have to give way to those at the left.

There was a regret in my heart though as i missed an opportunity to go deeper into spiritual conversation with a lady who was doing my nails. We had some pretty good conversation and i realised my name, jasmine was pretty popular over there ;p She asked me, "Are you a buddhist? " and i said i was christian. Following that was a pause and we did not continue further. i am not sure what my hesitation was about. Maybe I thought I was 'respecting' her by not being confrontational but it remain as a regret with me as God spoke to me through Romans later through paul as he shared that he will preach the gospel to where it is not known. Next time, next time i will do it :)