It is more blessed to give than to recieve

I was wondering about some questions - ministry, relationships, self-preservation. Yes, self-preservation. This has been shared by Pastor Jeff a few weeks back during his sermon. It reminds me of the image of a porcupine. Any step closer and out comes the spikes. Have you ever seen one before? I did and it's true, before u can even reach them, it happens. They defend.

This led me to think about Paul, one of the heroes in the bible. How in the world did he manage to find zeal to serve God in his busyness and yet able to stay focused, moving forward in his ministry? Because he is Paul? Well, isn't he human afterall? Doesn't he have needs, just any one of us. I am sure his flesh will be tested, his heart tempted to stray.

As I read through Acts, I see Paul going from one place to another preaching the WOG, testifying to the truth of the gospel. Despite his amazing persuasive skills, he was not able to convince all his audience and was even being abused by them. Even after trying his best, yes. However, his response is always to leave the place after his work is done and continue on to the next place. He said, "...your blood is on your heads! I am clear of my responsibilities" (Acts 18:6) and "when they asked him to spend more time with them, he declined" (Acts 18:20). He certainly knew when and how to say no! :)

I wondered, is he able to remain so focused because he lacked emotions and was only interested in completing the task? Not true. In Acts 17:6, "he was greatly distressed to see that the city was full of idols." God said to him in Acts 18:9, "do not be afraid, keep on speaking." He has his fair share of fears and distress, just like anyone else. Paul - eloquent, determined, confident and not easily intimidated. He was so badly hurt that he shook out is clothes in protest. He must have wanted to go into self-preservation mode but God stopped him, pulled him back and comforted him. He assured His presence and the people who will support him.

Alas, I understood. He knew what the Lord wants him to do instead of looking at what he wants. Therefore, he was able to surrender the outcome to God. Acts 20:24. He knew that when he has done what God has asked him to, it is enough. Acts 20:26, "I declare to you today that I am innocent of the blood of all men. For I have not hesitated to proclaim to you the whole will of God" and verse 25, "you yourselves know that these hands of mine have supplied my own needs and the needs of my companions. In everything I did, I showed you by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the word the Lord Jesus himself said, "It is more blessed to give than to receive." Even after all that he has been through, he was still able to maintain that it is more blessed to give than to receive. This is an amazing example to learn from!

This verse took on a new dimension for me today...